Deuce

And its twos again. two days till the departure of one of my best friends. My fellow Lonely Hearts' club member. And two weeks till my own departure, and the inpending onset of the second year of my medical studies. And 2 days till my FD matures where I'd be able to pay my school fees for my 2nd year which is 2 days overdue.

Spent my last couple of days thinking bout the past couple of months and what i have acheived in this holiday. I've had plenty of rest. Perhaps a little more that i should have. But it was a good rest. A great break from what have became a laborous march towards being a doctor. the longest that i would perhaps ever have. I perhaps spent too much time on my computer. Watching shows and playing games. Time that perhaps i should have spent playing music and making things. Things I have only started doing the past couple of weeks.

You know how people always say that if they'd go back to the past, they'd not change a damn thing even though they had shit times? This is one of those times that i could not say that.That is not to say that I've not had had a good holiday and that i didn't enjoy it to perhaps one of the bests that i could, but Given a second chance of such a holiday, I would perhaps find work and stuff and not laze around as much. I'd perhaps read more books and write more stuff, as i slowly feel my pen, or rather my keyboard, coming back to me, and my brain starting to function like i wished it would again. Perhaps it had something to do with an excess of time coupled with complete inactivity of the learning faculties, perhaps our brains are not made to work if we are to think, or think if we are to work, that's why those which could do both simultaneously are so well sought after eh?

Its great to be musing over things unimportant again. To think about the many chinese new year traditions and read about them, Its pretty cool. Since we're still in the supposed 15 days of celebration. And on that, I demand to have my 15 days of celebration back. Its supposed to be 15 days for a reason, there's a day for everything. including rocks and stuff. where on that day you're not supposed to use any earthenware.

And I finally have a new year resolution I want keep this year. 1 post a month of a suitable length, and a few shorter ones or song lyrics or youtube videos. But yeah, I guess i want to write things other than ethical conduct of a doctor. Or maybe I would perhaps one day write something about that someday over here.

Enough about resolutions. I like to keep them short and without much of an explanation. for they are somewhat depressing to me for reasons unknown. Perhaps its my innate psychological factors that prevents me form following a code or resolution, even if set by myself. Or perhaps developmental factors. Perhaps i would never know. But resolutions are depressing. they are. After the initial hooha about what i am gonna achieve and what i'm gonna do and stuff, you're left with actually doing it. Now that. I don't like. haha.

2 days to valentine's. Perhaps the most commercialised festival as some would say. Just got my lonely hearts' club name stolen and dragged on the floor by glee. What would the beatles say. Damn.

I would like to say I've nothing to do, nowhere to be, just a simple little kind of free. and that I'm perfectly lonely. But truth is, i guess i ain't. The moving into the eriksson's Intimacy Vs Isolation stage of development has taken its toll on me. Though i know that i've used this moving as an excuse more than once. But yeah. There's some truth in human lifespan development after all eh.

and 3 am now. I'm a little tired. and my mind a little whacked, fried from the radiation of my computer and the extremely glaring screen under the lights off conditions of my room brought upon by my oppresion. Its an oppression i won't ever go all 'egypt' on. Maybe a little fights here and there, but yeah, I'll cope with the bright screens and tired eyes.

And its 3AM. I shall stop spewing nonsense and go to bed. And attempt to dream, or perhaps not to, or perhaps just to get some rest. Tomorrow's gonna be good.

Till next time then.

Excelsior.