Balancing on
One wounded wing
Circling the edge
Of the neverending
The best of the vanished marvels have gathered inside your door

More than begin
But less than forget
But spirits born
From the not happened yet
Gathering there
To pay off a debt brought back from the wars

We thought we lost you
We thought we lost you
We thought we lost you
Welcome back

Sleeping for years
Pick through what is left
Through the pieces that fell and rose from the depth
From the rainwater well
Deep as a secret nobody knows

Less than forget
But more than begun
These adventures in solitude never done
To the names of our wounds
We send the same blood back from the wars

We thought we lost you
We thought we lost you
We thought we lost you
It will all come back

I know you want to
Run far away from one more
And that it's coming at a bad time
Some cold place
Heartless ways
For all we know

I know you need to
Breathe through
Come back
Come too
But it's coming at a bad time
Tangled day
For all we know

I know you want to
Run far away from one more
And that's coming at a bad time
Some cold race
Heartless ways
For all we know

I know you want to
Breathe through
Come back
Come too
But it's coming at a bad time
Old scarred face
Survivor's guilt
For all we know

Adventures.

lol

Some call me a wagabond, and some say i'm a wigilante. As i striwe for wictory against the world against me at such a welocity.in this wacant wacuum we call humankind. I stand wanguished, a wagrant and a wagabond, a poor wapour of a man. But in this waricose wein of a wampid world, i know one day, i would be windicated and awenged, and then i will stand wenerable and inwincible.

enough of jokes about me not being able to pronouce the letter v.

wrong side.

There's a old saying about getting out of bed the wrong way or the wrong side or something on a particular day and that particular day turning out to be somewhat shitty. Well, those days are a dime a dozen since i came over here. Sure they're awesome days that i've been blogging about, but little shitty incidences have littered my life here.

like today. I woke up 15 mins late, not a damn much you say. but seeing i take 45 mins in the morning to get from half-awake drunkeness to full power rockstardom, 15 mins is a third of the time. After my ORD, i am now fully incapable of waking up and being battle ready in like 5 mins. I need my time to check soccernet, have my cup of coffee, and wander around the room and finally settle for my choice of breakfast crackers, and then to bathe, not the army wash down where i use one soap literally from head to toe. But to slowly and meticulously wash and ready each part of my body for the oncoming day. so 15mins wander, 15 mins breakfast and 15 mins bathe. waking up 15 mins late means i've to shave 5 mins off everything. which totally sucked. And to add to that, i have to sorta lose my watch today of all days. Granted, it may just be at rusdens, but yeah, in my 15-mins-too-early state in the morning, trying to recall where i took off my watch is of great difficulty.

What followed was running, searching, and more running. Which in this cold weather, resulted in me catching a cold. Which left me facing the dilemma whether to hack off my nose or to get a scapel and take out my whole respiratory system. Its only for that last remnant of logical thought despite its obvious hypoxia that stopped me from doing so.

And let's just say this is not the first time i 'woke up at the wrong side of the bed'.

How the hell i get off the wrong side when i there's only one side of my bed that i could get out from.

Damn i hate my nose.

And bloody crazy angmohs are blasting party music a couple of rooms away.

One more time i hear that 'break , break your heart' song, i'm going to get my knife and show them exactly that. lol.

Live forever

Maybe I don't really want to know
How your garden grows
I just want to fly Lately did you ever feel the pain
In the morning rain
As it soaks it to the bone

Maybe I just want to fly
I want to live I don't want to die
Maybe I just want to breath
Maybe I just don't believe
Maybe you're the same as me
We see things they'll never see
You and I are gonna live forever

Maybe I don't really want to know
How your garden grows
I just want to fly Lately did you ever feel the pain
In the morning rain
As it soaks it to the bone

Maybe I will never be
All the things that I want to be
But now is not the time to cry
Now's the time to find out why
I think you're the same as me
We see things they'll never see
You and I are gonna live forever

Live forever - Oasis

Awesome shit.

one week in the winter cold

Well. there's something in the winter cold that i love.

Sure i miss my friends in singapore, chilling out and drinking, eating great food and going around and stuff. But that would certainly be unfair the the fun i had been having here at melbourne. The cold turn many away into their rooms and heaters, but somehow i enjoy that slight chill on my cheeks, that cold. That refreshingly awakening cold.

And its been a week. School has been well, stressful like school is supposed to be.but i am enjoying my return to freedom of my room, to sip cider from my armchair with my legs comfortably on my table. Now that is the life.

I know that i may change, and things may change. But typing this now from the comfort of this four walls that shouldn't even feel comfortable. I am satisfied.

There may come a time soon when i say screw this, i'm going back once my course ends. But the allure of melbourne is just so great for me.

The cold isn't depressing. Its calming.

midpoint conclusion

And thus it ends, with a spin of the wheel and the taste of merlot. For 5% at least. and the first half of my first year overseas conclude. I'm immensely tired from the paper and its preparation and all the great fun i had today. But yeah. I thought i would write a few things before the night is done.

And its been a little more than 4 months here in melbourne, alright. fine. Clayton. And i am actually suprised at how well it went. Like true, there have been ups and downs and some episodes of epicness with some moments of homesickness. But yeah. Its been great.

I would have wrote more. but yeah. that would be wierd. In a way at least. And So i shall leave it here. sipping my Cabernet Merlot. But yeah.

Thank you. Nurul, Cheryl, Coral, Chelsea, Chris, Wei Ming, Sufandy, Joel, Jean, Chee Cheen, Kenneth. For making my melbourne days so far A-awesome. Gonna miss you guys when you are back in singapore man. haha. cheers!

Here i sit amongst my pile of notes. read and unread. While acute stress raises my body histamine levels, making my skin itch. ("what? in which set of notes was that? Acute inflammation? Stress management?", Medicine kid #1059) Death, Dying and Palliative care sprawled out in front of me. Random coincidence? or forewarning of some sort?

My brain is not functioning. Well, it shouldn't be. I did not study about it. Skipped that part from that chapter on nerves.

Hell. 16 hours away.
20 till it freezes over.

Maybe its the living in this cell of mine.
Maybe its the MSG.
Maybe its the repeated studying.
Mayve its just me.

Can't seem to calm myself down to study today. and its just 3 short/long days left. dammit.

3 more.

Alive.

I am not dead.

not in the literal sense of the word anyway. Its been almost a month now since i last posted. And contradicting popular belief, i am still well alive and kicking. Though sometimes i'm not really sure about the well part. I'm flooded now my a torrent of microorganisms while trying to find my footing in the ever changing realm of pharmacology. Cancer shines high upon the skies, and good things never happen when that is the case.

Alright. enough nonsense. not in the trascription, translation manner.

Back to studying.

Hall Room musical :scene 1

What's so amazing,
That keeps us stargazin'?
And what do we think we might see?

Was just looking at the stars on my way home and was once again captivated like i always am. And the stars brought me to those old days where i tried to catch one of them and trap them in my hands. And yeah. That star wasn't there.

But,

Someday we'll find it,
The rainbow connection,
The lovers, The dreamers, and me.

Its still me, Strumming my guitar ever so tenderly, wrapping my hands around her slender neck. And then.

I looked at the world,
and i know it is turning.
Still my guitar, gently weeps.

Till next time, my friends.